A Letter To Myself 3 Years Ago
I wish you would stop trying to bury what happened to you, because it will claw its way out no matter how many times you try. Nearly three years from now, it will remain a memory just as vivid, but you will be strong.
I wish you could know that it’s okay to trust others. Men aren’t out there to hurt and use you, though I understand why you’ll think that way. Oh don’t get me wrong, you’ll encounter your share of douche bags, but a lot of guys will actually like you for you, even if you don’t see it at that moment.
I wish you could know how scared you are as you write this. Because even though it’s been years, accepting it never got easier.
I wish you could understand that you’re not alone right now. You will meet a lot of amazing women who will understand what its like to try to make sense of something senseless and who will inspire you with their strength.
Above all, I wish you could believe in your worth. You have many crazy years ahead of you, and I wish you would give yourself some credit - because you are intelligent, talented, beautiful, and worthy, and being raped didn’t take that away from you. I know you feel broken, but you will rebuild yourself and you will grow.
In a few years, you will be strong and alive but you will still cry. You will still be in mourning because you will still feel like a part of you died that night. But it’s okay. You are a work in progress, and believe me, the future is much, much brighter than it seems right now.