To my past self,
You will survive. It might not feel possible, but you will. There will be nights that you cry, and days that seem insurmountable… but you will get through. You have the strength and the will to carry on and push through, even though you feel weak.

You will grow. Your nightmares won’t always control you. And one day you will even be able to sleep without triple checking the lock on your door. Your fears will not be your end -they are only the beginning of your courage. You will learn to use your pain to become something better.

You are not alone. I know you blame yourself, and I understand why, but that doe not mean you have to carry this all on your own. There will always be people at your side to help, to give you a moment to breathe. Sometimes you will push them away, but somehow they will always find their way back to help you when you need it most.

You will forgive yourself. It will not be an overnight revelation, but one that happens over years. Eventually your shame will turn in to pride and you will realize exactly how far you’ve come. You will find a way to use your experience to help others.

You will let go. Your walls will come down. You’ll trust. You’ll love. You’ll be happy.

Just don’t give up.